When I'm Retired

I have been thinking about things I want to remember when I retire, such as:

• I want to remember how busy life is for those still working and how hard it is to squeeze all the daily demands into those 24 hours---work, home life, kids, chores, remembering birthdays and to send cards, keeping up friendships, visiting family members, responding to church obligations, writing thank-you notes, etc., etc.  And I want to remember that I have more time than those still working and so should offer to help whenever possible.
• I want to remember that I think I'm still busy but that I'm not really; at least not as busy as those still trying to hold down jobs in order to take care of a family.  I'm the one with more time, so I need to be the one to take initiative and do more to help those busier than me; I need to go visit my kids, because I'm retired with more time, and it is much more difficult for them to come to me.
• I want to remember not to make my children feel guilty if they don't come to visit me as often as I think they should, because they are trying to hold everything together and raise families and work jobs.  I need to make the effort to go see them.
• I want to remember how much it would help my family members if I did things for them that they never would request, like go clean their house one day so they can come home to a clean-smelling house and less worry and guilt over the dirt they don't have time to clean, or cook a nice dinner and take it to them, so maybe they can get a little more rest for one evening.  Little things mean a lot.  I want to remember that.
• I want to remember that no matter how old my children get, they still need to feel accepted, loved and worthy by their parents.  They will still need my advice and my help.  I didn't retire from being their parent.  I will go visit them often, but I will let them know I'm coming and make sure it is convenient for them.  I won't get offended if "today is not a good day."  I will be happy if they are doing something fun, so they won't be home to see me today--I will celebrate that they have a chance to enjoy themselves.
• I want to remember how nice it is to have some time away from children, and I will offer to babysit often.  
• I want to remember not to judge and criticize my children's parenting styles, but to offer advice only when it is wanted and asked for.  
• I want to remember to spoil my grandchildren and to remember that, like my own children, they won't stay little for long, so I will take them for ice cream, take them on trips when possible, go see their plays and they ball games, etc.  I will make memories with them that they will have when I'm gone.  
• I want to remember to spoil my grandchildren but to remember that I, too, am a role model and a teacher to them.  I will talk to them about God.
• I want to remember that when I am older I have more time to volunteer, and as long as I am able, I should still be making a positive difference in the world.  If I'm still here and able, God has me here for a reason, and I shouldn't get lazy or complacent or feel entitled to laziness.  I'm retired, not dead.